


A Delicacy In Ten Different Systems

by Eustacia Vye (eustaciavye)



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-06
Updated: 2010-08-06
Packaged: 2017-10-10 23:26:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/105591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eustaciavye/pseuds/Eustacia%20Vye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He bought himself the orange colored berries that he <i>thought</i> were rajael berries, quite the delicacy on ten different systems. He really should have double checked what he had eaten.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Delicacy In Ten Different Systems

**Author's Note:**

> sinecure (on LJ and DW) was bemoaning the extreme lack of Doctor/TARDIS smut when she stumbled across a River/Serenity ficlet I wrote for [Porn Battle X.](http://oxoniensis.dreamwidth.org/30726.html) I took it upon myself to fulfill this woefully underserved need. What can I say? I love a challenge. :D Also written for the "sex pollen" box on my [hc_bingo](http://community.livejournal.com/hc_bingo/) card.)

The Doctor dropped Amy and Rory off for a wonderful little honeymoon on Helios, a place that very closely resembled the Riviera. The planet was nothing but sun and beaches and temperate waters that were perfect for swimming in. He'd even gotten the time frame right; it would be another thousand years before Helios' sun started to heat up and boil the seas. The Doctor wandered along the edge of the boardwalk bazaar, poking about at the trinkets. This was a relatively safe place in a relatively safe time frame, the perfect place for the newlyweds to have a little fun together on the beach.

Which of course meant that things would go horribly wrong somehow.

He bought himself the orange colored berries that he _thought_ were rajael berries, quite the delicacy on ten different systems. They melted on the tongue like warm butter but tasted like pure sin, and cost an arm and a leg for most locals. The Doctor smiled and took the orange berries from the vendor, beginning to take a stroll along the boardwalk under the hot sun. He popped a few berries, absentmindedly chewing on them. They didn't melt but still tasted _wonderful,_ and it didn't occur to him until he was halfway through the bag that the berries should have melted under his tongue. His tongue in question felt comfortably fuzzy. Wait, what? It shouldn't have been fuzzy. For all that he regenerated into this tall, gangling man with longish hair, he most certainly did _not_ regenerate with a fuzzy tongue. He'd been in this body for some time now, and he felt fairly sure that he knew what it felt like by now. Fuzzy tongues were not part of his usual anatomy, he was fairly certainly sure on that point.

Time to check what he'd actually eaten, then.

The TARDIS was still right where he had parked her, and he nearly tripped over his own feet and stumbled into the control room. "Hullo, beautiful," the Doctor said, words slurring. He gave the main console a loopy smile and slung his arm around the keyboard. He stroked the space bar. "Space, you sexy thing, it is a _wonderful_ thing." _You're intoxicated,_ the TARDIS seemed to say. Her voice wasn't exactly disapproving, but the Doctor frowned. "Love, don't be mad a me," he said, running his hand over the oscilloscope. "I always come back to you. You're the only one that's important." She seemed to hum pleasantly beneath his fingertips, and that shot straight down to his groin. _"Fuck,"_ he groaned. "I don't think these were rajael berries after all."

The Doctor dropped the little bag with leftover berries onto the console. It wasn't the medical bay, but his hearts were starting to beat double time. He probably wasn't going to make it there, and the TARDIS could do scans from anywhere, really. The medical bay was really best for whichever Companion came along. He fell to his knees, head bowed until it touched the clear floor. He could see all those wires and connections, the inputs and outputs and reconfigured bits of machinery that hid the heart of the TARDIS and kept her running smoothly. The Doctor squinted slightly. Was the casing ajar? Was that why he felt so ill? He pulled himself along the flooring until he could get to the panel that would allow him to slide down below. It was too warm in the control room, much too warm, and he would have to fix that somehow. He would have to go through the panels and wiring and he had something to fix that with, yes? The Doctor patted himself down, feeling the oddness of his pockets, the lumps and bumps that meant there were things in there.

Oh, yes. Sonic screwdriver. Everything was better with a little more sonic.

The TARDIS hummed pleasantly as the Doctor started removing panels. He removed his jacket and loosened his bowtie, then rolled up his sleeves to get to work. He slid his hands between wires and cables, feeling his way along. Her hum was pleasant, simmering beneath his skin, and he looked up toward the console in pure joy. "Flirting with me, are you?" he asked. She seemed to laugh beneath his hands, and he began to laugh as well. This was silly, wonderfully silly, and the Doctor started to bend over the tangle of wires in front of him. "Darling girl, just look at you. Making more work for me, aren't you?" He laughed again, then moved to take off his shirt when his rolled up cuffs got tangled in the wiring. It was still hot, so while he was at it, he stripped down to his boxers. He wriggled around, digging deep into the wiring beneath the console. Now why in the world would the environmental controls be down so far?

The Doctor dove in headfirst, wriggling around desperately. Ooh, but that felt good. It seemed to help ease that awful heat that was going, and he shimmied some more. The TARDIS hummed around him, going from pleasantly amused to downright... aroused? Was that right? She was certainly encouraging. Maybe she felt that the environmental settings were too high, too. He kept moving, his breath coming in short pants. It vaguely occurred to him that he was hard as a rock and was practically dry humping the conduits. But it felt good, too good, and the TARDIS was humming along as if she liked it, too. He was slipping farther down, and fetched up somewhere near the TARDIS' heart. It pulsed and was warm, and he could feel her all around him as he came, hips gyrating. But even then, it wasn't enough. His skin still felt too hot, and his hearts were still going at least double time. The TARDIS hummed all around him, her voice a warmth that was comfortable and familiar and _home._ The Doctor kept moving against the conduits, throwing his mind open wide.

_Ready, love?_

_Of course,_ she replied, voice warm with a smile she couldn't actually smile. And then she spoke in Gallifreyan, a whisper across his mind like a lover's caress.

The Doctor had no idea how much time he spent curled around the heart of the TARDIS, but he was sticky and filthy and utterly exhausted once he was done. He ran his hands through his hair, tugging on it as he thought. "Those were really jeyash berries, weren't they?" he asked ruefully. The TARDIS laughed at him, a mocking sound. He couldn't be mad, however. "It had been centuries since I've had those," he commented, starting to shimmy out from under the console. "And I was physically an old man at the time. It couldn't have been as good for you, love."

_Oh, Doctor,_ the TARDIS told him with a sigh. _Your mind is always beautiful to me._

He smiled and pressed his lips to the central column of the console, giving her a loving kiss. "You flatterer. You always say the nicest things. I'd best go wash up and then start walking along the beach."

The Doctor's gaze landed on the half bag of jeyash berries still lying on the console. He picked it up with a smile. "I'll save these for later. It's not too often that I see these."

The TARDIS' amused laughter was all he needed to hear.

The End


End file.
